Thursday, December 27, 2012

All Pursuits Worthwhile: Unspoken Words

(thank you Paula Sandtoes for the inspiration)

An Accident
A flightless bird,
Wearing the wings of an angel
Forever soaring
In a bottomless sky


What would I say to you?

I would express Gratitude and Love of course. But, what would that bring me? Peace, solace in our separate dimensional states. I think that act of expression would be more for me… to recompense for my shape shifting memory of who gave more to the other? An ego trick like a tossed coin whose slip through the cracks mystified the idea of a true winner.

What would I say to you?

Why? I would ask why did this happen? Again, who am I asking? I halted those questions, ponderings, because of their cyclical nature, or more contextually, their tendencies towards insomnia. Like the catalyst of the Rupe Goldberg that faltered three quarters of the way through. The machine that stopped in its tracks, not due to self-reflection or error, but because of the unnatural, nonsensical randomness that shook this world when you fell.

What would I say to you?

Nothing. You are listening or you are not. I will never know. You are perfect and I’ve said what I already have and I live with this. I live with your lessons, your love, your high arching spirit. I am not alone. I know it, I believe it, I do not understand it.

What would I say to me?

I would say Unspoken words are timeless. We always exist together. How lucky and special it was to form a bond, a connection I didn’t know possible, with another. Open your eyes to this world that has always existed, now exists in new depths with a larger Crayola box, a world where possibilities spill over the boundaries into itself with infinite passion, purpose and love.

I would say this:

Distance is illusory. Time is a myth. And your extended arm, leapfrogging legs and contagious childlike energy are a blink away.

You don’t know how powerful you are. You don’t know how wide your love has reached. You have changed me, me who has told her a joke, a joke that she shared with him. And that laughing smile, oh boy that smile. That smile changed their lives and united their families.

You are the happy baby, playing on the floor, oblivious to the eyes seeking their youth back. You have taught me that to find, you must seek, and to become, all you have to do is try. You have reinforced you are what you love, not what loves you. You have made mountains out of handkerchiefs and dance parties out of stars.

Stars which twinkle light years away. Stars which shine timeless light onto us breathers, us dreamers. 
Stars which breathe in the sky and sing and share jokes with their neighbors. You have become a star. You have joined the other stars. One day I will join you, and we’ll do it all over again. Until then, all I have to do is look up.

You’ve changed my life. Thank you. I will always love you.

All we have to do is look up.

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